It’s like this…

See, here is the problem with not blogging every day. 

Many times, over the last while, very interesting things have happened to me.  Big revelations and small.  And I would come to my computer sit down to share it with you, but then I’d think about something else that had happened, and something else, and something else, and I would think, “Well, this certainly isn’t more interesting/important than that!“ 

So, how could I write about what I wanted to, without writing about all the other things.  And it became sort of like a messy bedroom, things got piled up and piled up, until finally, it was just too much to deal with and it seemed like the easiest solution was to firmly shut the door when company came over and never let anyone in there. 

However, that can be kind of lonely.  Not to mention, guilt inducing. 

So, I’ve decided to do a “clean sweep” so to speak.  (Is that a proper phrase?)

Whatever.

I’m doing a clean sweep, like that show they used to have where a crew of people would show up at someone’s home and sift through the cluttered up disaster that was their life and make it all fresh and sparkling clean again. 

Now, my life isn’t a disaster.  It sort of felt like that for a few months after my youngest child left home and I was trying to figure out who I was when I didn’t have the ballast of my children and their lives steadying me. 

So, what I’ve decided to do is sort out the things I wanted to blog about, mention them, get on with it, so I can get back to blog comfortably, if and when I want. 

So, please forgive the rather sterile format that is to follow, but it’s the only way I could think of to dispatch all the things that have happened that I said to myself, “Now, if I was blogging, I’d blog about that!“

* My boy David GOT ENGAGED!  Huge deal.  Very exciting.  Love his fiance.

*I TURNED 50!  Another HUGE deal.  (Actually, it was huge for the couple of months leading up to it, but actually turning 50 was absolutely wonderful, and maybe someday I’ll write about it, but not now, because I’ll never get to the other things on my to-do/tell list.)

*Jenny’s friend (and makeup artist extraodinare) gave me a free Dr. Kiss!  Hmm…just typing that I realize that maybe it sounds more titillating than it actually is.  And no people a Dr. Kiss is not like some sort of fabulous kissing lesson that cures all your ills.  Dr. Kiss is a hydrating satin finish lip balm and it tastes and smells like vanilla and I really like it alot.  I tried to give him money for it, and he wouldn’t take the money because duh, it was a gift, and there I was, selfishly trying to force the money on this sweet guy because I didn’t know him very well and he was Jenny’s friend and just because I was her sister, didn’t mean that I should take advantage of his good nature, but he wouldn’t take the money, so I said, I’d blog about his balm then, and all of this happened in November 2009, and as you know, there have been no blogs forthcoming, so you can see why this was sitting heavy on my chest.  ANYWAY, if this excellent lip balm for the makeup artist to the stars sounds like something you might like, you can check it out at vanitymark.com.

*I ate at Morton and John’s restaurant Fresh and it was very tasty and I wish that there was a Fresh in my town.  (You remember Morton and John?  They were at my sister Jenny’s fabulous Paris birthday party.)

*I did another episode of Caprica and they didn’t kill me off.  Didn’t expect to do another one of them.  My friend, Eric emailed me again, and so I said, sure, because I’d had so much fun doing the last one.  I had thought Eric was directing this one as well, but he wasn’t.  Michael was.  Michael and I had very different ideas about the scene, but I figured it was his show and he seemed to know what he wanted, and it didn’t really matter to me, since I was only doing the one scene and he knew how he wanted it to tie in with everything else, so I did it his way. (Or at least I think I did, to the very best of my rusty ability.)

* We bought another house, have put this one up for sale and are going to be moving again when we come back from a trip to England to visit my boy, Will.

* I’m not looking forward to packing again.

*OR changing ALL of our mail!  Sheesh!  I just finished getting it all transfered over to this place.

*And why are we moving again?  It’s a very long story and I don’t have the time to tell it today. 

*Sometimes I love my dog, and sometimes, like when she whines in the car, I wish I didn’t have her. 

*On December 9th, I gave myself the goal to lose 10 lbs before I turned 50 and I thought it was an impossible goal to lose 10 lbs in 2 months and one week, especially over the Christmas holidays, but I DID IT!  I lost 12 1/2 and it wasn’t as hard as I thought it was going to be and I’m REALLY, REALLY happy about it!

* Yes, I bought myself a little 2 door coupe for my 50th and am embarrassed to admit that I love it.  Because I am not, have never been a person who “loves” an inanimate object.  Even worse, a car for godsakes!  I bought a car?!  How the h__l did that happen?  Who is this person in the mirror who would spend money on such a frivolous object when there is such need in the world?  And how come it gives me such a happy feeling to zip around in it.  Why do I feel so happy that I can do U-turns and dart into parking places?  Hello?  Aren’t U-turns illegal?  (Are they? hmm.  Everywhere has different rules, can’t remember if it’s okay here.  Maybe I’ll check in the morning.  Wonder who I’d call to ask.  DMV I suppose.)

*My literary agent, Laura Langlie, is the very best agent in the whole world.  She did something so thoughtful and generous Thursday, I was really quite overwhelmed. 

*I’m still in love with Don and come March we will have fallen in love 9 years ago. 

*Will is auditioning for acting schools.  Such a mix of emotions for me.  Have to trust that everything will work out.  He is good, talented, but still I get scared.  Don’t want him to get hurt.

*Emily is still plugging away on her project.  I don’t know how she does it.

* My sister Becky has started a new business, Heartsong.  She does tinctures and healing herbal teas, and for Christmas and my birthday she put together this whole regime of vitamins and healing tea and foodstuff I’m supposed to eat, to help with my aching joints and menopause and stuff.  And I know she’s my sister and loves me and all, but I was a little nervous, watching her mix all this stuff up, because I don’t generally do the vitamin/tincture/healing teas type of thing, and it all looked very mysterious and I didn’t want to get accidentally poisoned, but guess what?!  Not only did I not get poisoned…BUT it’s actually helping!  Go figure!  Crazy, little clever Becky!

*Don is going to the Olympics.  Weird that.  He is SO excited, and me?  I have no desire to go.  Absolutely none.  Strange huh.  He’s vibrating with anticipation.  We’re having to watch Olympic stuff on the TV.  I humor him and sit with him for a couple of events so it will help make this whole, I’m-going-to-the-real-live-Olympics-for-real-and-this-was-on-my-things-to-do-before-I-die-list-and-now-I’m-actually-going-to-do-it, seem like more than a party of one.  But really, left to my own devices, I wouldn’t be watching.  The last Olympic event that I watched was way back in the 80’s when my daughter was a baby and Katerina deWitt (not sure if I spelt that right) won the gold for women’s ice skating.

*What else?  There’s a ton more.  Let’s see.  Oh, Colin has been getting nominated for a zillion Best Actor awards for his performance in A Single Man!  And the whole family is super proud and happy for him.

*I finally finished my adult manuscript and don’t know if it is any good or not. 

*Ditto with the YA one.

*I’m not writing right now.  Thought maybe I was done.  But nah… Realized yesterday that I’m just taking a breather. 

*I like breathers, now that I know that’s all it is.  Let me tell you, when you think it might be the end, that you have nothing else to say, that’s not such a cheery feeling.

*Rosie helped the I’m-a-crap-writer feeling to abate as well.  It’s like sometimes I feel like she’s a drop-in guardian angel.  Plops in for a second when things get tough, says a couple of things, that maybe wouldn’t mean much to someone else, but really resonate with me, and somehow her words stick, and there is a shift and I get perspective.

*Jenny was on Craig Ferguson last night.  I’d never watched his show before.  I really liked him.  I thought he was very funny!  And of course my sister was funny as well.  And beautiful and I liked her dress and the new streaks in her hair.

*J___ got honoured at the Academy, and when they showed the clip of the old J___ talking, I started bawling my eyes out.  So sad, couldn’t stop.  Jenny, patting my back.  Me trying to get it under control before the lights came back up. 

*Norman Jewison was honoured by the Directors Guild with a Lifetime achievement award and they asked me to come to LA and made all these arrangements, emails flying back and forth, and they wanted me to arrive early and go through the press line, and Jenny made her friend come over and do my makeup, even though I insisted that I was perfectly competent to put on my own makeup. 
But when we got there, I don’t know what happened, but I thought, they don’t want to talk with me, even though the man from the Directors Guild has specifically asked me to go through the press line with it’s red carpet and flashing light blubs, and instead I slipped around the back and disappeared in the crowd.  But now I feel bad about it, because I was there for Norman, who was the kindest director I ever worked for, and I should have gone through and talked about what a wonderful man he is, and how lucky I was to know him and work with him.  And how the world is a better place for him having been in it.  But I didn’t. 

Posted by Meg Tilly on Saturday, February 20, 2010 in Chewing the Fat